I really dislike games sometimes. Not because I don’t like to play or not because I don’t have fun, but because of the competitiveness. It’s that floodgate, that door I don’t want to open. I can get really competitive.
I really have only two switches here, on and off, either full on or none at all. I’ve just lived with none at all, and it’s been okay. I don’t miss being competitive. But I wondered why I didn’t like being competitive and games and what not.
They’re not fair. They’re about luck, manipulation, and an always loser. There are so many instances where no matter how well you play, you lose, just because the luck is against you. They’re about trying to trick people and get them to do something that’s better or lying.
And no matter what, they’re always about finding a loser.
It’s fine to say you love games. I just don’t. I don’t like any of those. I like to think if I play my cards right, I’ll be okay. I like to not have to manipulate people. And I like a world in which it doesn’t matter who is a loser, or if there is one.
So it’s fine, and probably right, to say I can’t handle competitive games. And it’s absolutely true.
I don’t judge people who love them. Just different strokes for different folks. I don’t think they’re worse people at all, they just like the strategy, the chase, the invisible crown.
I just don’t want it.