Too Much

Sometimes it just feels too much. Sometimes it just feel likes I gave up too much. Sometimes I don’t know who I am. Sometimes, moments like this, it just fills up the void with resentment and anger.

I know this moment passes, that this is just a lack of clarity. A blip or a bubble and that it’s not how I feel all the time. (But let’s be real, if it was how I felt all the time, wouldn’t that be an even scarier thought?)

Sometimes it just feels like nothing can compare to my life before and that this choice fills me up with so much resentment that I can never get back. I have made the choice no matter what the motivation or feeling and I can never get it back to before I did.

But sometimes it just feels like too much. Like too much has changed and too much has been lost.

This post seems so depressing and sad, but it’s a blip of overwhelming.

The holiday season brings up all this nostalgia for home. I’m one of the few people not returning home, and it just makes me long for something I can’t have. And so it brings about these feelings of too much resulting in too much resentment.

This too shall pass.