I did a presentation on cannibalism in fairy tales, I could talk about that for a while, but it made me think of fairy tale justice instead.
When I was a kid, and even now, I got this idea in my head that the good people would always triumph in the end, that no matter how hard it got for them, their goodness would prevail. Furthermore, I thought that no matter how many victories the bad guys would win, they would ultimately lose the war. That good would always triumph and bad would fall.
This is something that is in a lot of fairy tales, think Snow White for example. They present justice in a black and white sense. No matter how many times Snow White opens the door for the Step Mother Witch and lets her con her, in the end she survives and the Step Mother Witch doesn’t. Despite falling into a coma, her goodness (illustrated by her natural affinity to nature and the animals) prevails.
And if you think closely, it’s in a lot of books and tales.
And so I thought that this was the way the world worked in real life, that no matter how good I was, or how much I was hurt or suffered, in the end I would be okay, that my goodness would prevail. I thought all you needed to be was good, but that is pretty far from the truth isn’t it? Because really horrible bad things happen to great people, they’re wronged, killed, oppressed, hurt, and sometime, maybe more than that, the bad guy gets away. There is no justice, the wrong isn’t punished and the right isn’t rewarded. Maybe this is super cynical, but I think I had this jaded illusion in the past. So maybe it’s just more realistic.
I’m not saying that the bad always will win and that why bother being good because it ultimately means nothing, I am merely saying, that being good isn’t enough. There is basic injustice, different backgrounds, different reasons why you can’t achieve what you want no matter how hard you work.
I’m not saying don’t try, it’s important to try because that’s what stops you from slipping downwards, but maybe be realistic. Well at least that’s what I’ve gotten from it.
Because I’ve had moments where all I think is, “This isn’t fair, I have done literally everything right, so why is this happening to me?” and at this moment, depending on the person you are, you may say, well God gives us challenges, or it’s fate, or we’re never given anything we can’t handle, or anything like that. But since I’m not sure where I stand in that department, I was just left with a sense of profound hurt, not because I was hurt, but because I felt the world had wronged me. That they had taken something I believed in with my whole heart and showed me that it was a sham. And it was really hard to admit to myself, that no it isn’t fair, but it is what it is. Life isn’t fair.
I know that’s something so many people say, but I always kind of thought, maybe it’s not, but shouldn’t it be?
So maybe that’s why I feel the way I do, or do the work I’ve done in the past.
But this presentation has certainly taught me a lot about myself and how I feel about the world.